My judgmental, critical spirit was my target in the sanctification project. I recognized this undesirable heart issue in myself a long time ago but never seemed to know how to handle it practically and effectively. Even as I began this project I struggled to create a biblical game plan. A critical spirit was, and is, often the source of frustration because I want to honor Christ by loving people well, but I am constrained by my depravity. In other sin issues I learned the thoughts and situations which instigated the sinful thoughts, actions, or behaviors; and to avoid the sin, I learned I must stop the instigators. But judgment comes so easily. It slides subtly under the radar of my conscience. I am typically unaware of my sinful heart until after the fact –the word spoken, the deed done, the thought complete.
II
The big-picture failure caused by this iniquity is simply, but deplorably, not living in the image of Christ. I fail to walk in His humility. I fail to love as He loves. I fail to care with His compassion. I fail to lay myself down. So when I react to a situation or person with a critical spirit, people do not see a humble, loving, compassionate Christ in me. They do not see the Christ who “made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant,” the Christ who “humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death” on the cross. The beauty of the Gospel, the Gospel which saved me, is tainted by my sin –not ultimately, but for that moment.
In judging others, I also fail to examine the log in my own eye. This is a complicated failing because I think my personal expectations were perhaps a subconscious justification for expecting much from others. The problem comes in that I do not meet my own high expectations –essentially perfection. On what grounds can I expect others to do so? So I guess the failure is not in examining the log in my own eye, but in examining my own ability and success in dealing with that log.
III
Apart from Christ, others are the primary sufferers from my sin. I guess that is the way it always is. At this point in my life, the victims are my family and friends. I love them dearly and desire so much for them to experience the joy of a life increasingly surrendered to the Lord. When I see seemingly unrepentant sin in their lives, I am concerned, knowing how easy it is for believers to grow hardened by subtle, sinful patterns. But my zeal turns sour when I am more concerned with conveying their sin than speaking the love and grace of Jesus Christ. I realize the truth must be spoken –but it must be spoken in love. And the latter is typically not even part of my thought process, let alone my words. This often has an adverse effect on the hearers –instead of drawing them to a merciful Christ, I drive them away from their judgmental sister. Unless the Holy Spirit intervenes, any words of truth I speak become as effective as clashing cymbals. All in all, I fail to edify my brothers and sisters. I fail to display the beauty of Christ to the perishing. I strip the hope from situations which could otherwise better bear joyful witness to the goodness and mercy of Christ’s redemptive work.
IV
Christ’s “Sermon on the Mount” in Matthew 5-7 was one of the key passages in which I began my study on a judgmental heart. The Beatitudes brought to light my wrong, though valued, views of self-sufficiency. “Blessed are the poor in spirit…Blessed are those who mourn…Blessed are the meek” (Matthew 5:3-5 English Standard Version). Control freaks like me tend to esteem the pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps mentality. If you see something that needs changed, fixed or accomplished, figure out the steps that need to be taken and do them. This mindset “Hulkinates” the virtue of responsibility and is contrary to Scripture. I was created for complete dependence on my Creator, not myself. I read the Beatitudes on multiple occasions, but never was I struck by my determination of the first three attributes as weaknesses. Poor in spirit, mourning, meekness –characteristics blessed by Christ and disdained by me. I did not value them in myself or others. Admittedly, it remains a war within my flesh.
Matthew 7:1-6 was another help, but not without bringing some confusion. Do not judge, Christ says. But neither should I give dogs what is holy or throw pearls to swine (ESV). Does the latter not imply judgment? I think one of this project’s umbrella lessons, as we educators like to say, is that the focus must not be on the how and when of judgment, but on the heart’s motives. If I go to my brother or sister after carefully examining the forest of logs in my own eye –and my inability to cut them out, my heart is right before God and man. But if I strike for the speck, my heart-set is flawed. And the reasoning behind my deliberate self-examination versus a direct attack intimates an even deeper heart issue. This root I found in Paul’s words to the church at Philippi.
Philippians 2:1-11, that beloved text on the humility of our Redeemer and King, became my most discerning, source-revealing tutor. I saw again the Beautiful One, who “made himself nothing, [took] the form of a servant” and “humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death…on the cross,” as my perfect example (ESV). Service. Humility. Obedience. I am often the antithesis of all three, and my judgmental heart makes this fact painfully evident. Cristi wants to be served. Cristi wants to raise herself up. Cristi wants to have her own way. Cristi is proud. The servant looks to the interests of others. The humble makes herself nothing. The obedient lays down her life, her reputation, her agenda. The judgmental presupposes the interests of others. The critical regards her verdict as more important than the hearer’s heart. The controller elevates her agenda above the Lord’s. I am guilty of all three, on multiple counts. But my hope is in Jesus, who was “made to be sin…so that in him [I] might become the righteousness of God” (2 Corinthians 5:21 ESV). My hope is in the “law of the Spirit of life that set me free from the law of sin and death” (Romans 8:2 ESV). My hope is in Jesus, “the founder and protector of [my] faith” (Hebrews 12:2 ESV).
V
The core heart issue is pride. Pride must be replaced with humility. I found Dr. Scott’s steps extremely helpful in understanding the pragmatics for working “out my own salvation with fear and trembling” in regard to my haughty heart (Philippians 2:12 ESV): pray for a divinely-searched heart, repentance from pride, and growth in humility; read the Psalms and Prophets; study Jesus; ask others if I seem prideful; spend focused time worshipping the Lord, centering on His love demonstrated at the Cross; practice the “one-anothers”; work with the Holy Spirit to exchange pride for humility; remember humility must become a way of life, a heart-set.
I said earlier, “I am concerned, knowing how easy it is for believers to grow hardened by subtle, sinful patterns.” Well, let me call a spade a spade. Concern is only a euphemism for fear. I fear the lack of spiritual maturation in my family and friends. This fear must be replaced with a deep trust in the Sovereignty of God. I need not try, nor can I control the salvation or sanctification of anyone.
The trio of characteristics from Philippians 2 must also replace the desires of my flesh to be served, to be praised, and to rebel. I must instead seek the heart of a servant, the heart of humility, and the heart of obedience.
VI
The most obvious cognation requiring transformation in a judgmental person would seem to be a judgmental thought. But I think there needs to some delineation. Judgment is not always bad. If I am to know people by their fruits, I must make a judgment. If I am to withhold pearls from swine, I must make a judgment. So I go back to my assertion that judgment must be evaluated by the heart motive behind it. I need the Holy Spirit to heighten my conscience that I may more quickly discern a wicked heart-set, leading to a speck-attacking judgment. In these situations, I must replace the attacking thought with a humble examination of my own weaknesses. If my thoughts reveal a desire to serve myself, I must intentionally seek to serve the other person and remember I am no better than him. I must look out for his interests. If my thoughts are schemes for self-exaltation, I must think of the humility of Christ and my dependence on Him. If my thoughts purpose to rebel, I must take them captive and replace them with the truths of God’s Word which they contradict. Compassion and mercy must replace judgment.
Another mindset in need of replacement is my expectation for perfection in myself and others. This is another form of pride but needs to be addressed in a specific manner. What is the pride of perfection? It begins with the arrogant supposition that God’s Word is wrong about the constant process of sanctification until glorification. This supposition must be supplanted with the truth of God’s Word. Hebrews 12:2 talks about life as a race in which weight and sin must be laid aside. Colossians 3 talks about the process of putting off and putting on. The battle is won, but it is fought until I am with Christ in heaven. Perfection also indicates a belief that my sanctification agenda is superior to the Lord’s. The supremacy of God’s thoughts in Isaiah 55:8-9 and His sovereignty over spiritual maturation in 1 Corinthians 3:7 are two truths which easily trump and settle any agenda superiority issue. Finally, perfection is the arrogant belief that I do not need God for growth in godliness. The simple remembrance of the reality of my depraved state and the truth of Romans 7:19 are the replacement mindsets for this belief.
The regard for self-sufficiency need also be eradicated and replaced. I must remember man was created to depend upon God from before the Fall. But mostly, I need to recall the Gospel. Going back to Philippians 2 and 2 Corinthians 5, Christ humbled Himself to the point of death on the cross that I might become righteous. 1 John 4:10, God “sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins” (ESV). In Christ, I am righteous. In Christ, I am free from sin. In Christ, I am an heir of God. In Christ, I am under no condemnation. In Christ, I can obey God’s law. Without Christ, I am nothing. The Gospel: self-sufficiency eradicator. Mission accomplished.
VII
The behaviors of the antithesis trio must all be replaced. Instead of saying things to serve myself, I must think of ways to serve others and do them. The specific actions could be a multitude of behaviors. I must look to the interest of others. Instead of speaking words to exalt myself, I must speak words that glorify Christ and edify others. I must lay down my life and my reputation. I must consider myself as nothing. Instead of choosing to rebel, I must choose to obey. This means knowing the Word of God so well that I can easily wield it as the mighty Sword against temptation.
VIII
As I mentioned above, sanctification is a process through which I must struggle until I am glorified with Christ. And Christ is glorified in the struggle, in the transformation. “For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot…But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness” (Romans 8:7, 10 ESV). In Christ I have the power over sin, but its presence remains until His return.
For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin (Romans 7:22-25 ESV).
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