2012 Christmas Letter

I realize I'm quite behind in actually publishing this on the blog. I was just so thrilled to get the hard copies mailed before the end of 2012, I didn't think much about anything else. So, without further ado... 

 "...take root downward and bear fruit upward." (Isaiah 37:31) 
Dear family and friends, 
The verse above is just a snippet from the encouraging, prophetic word God gave Isaiah for King Hezekiah when the mighty Assyrian army stood at his door. Ultimately, Hezekiah did nothing to defeat the Assyrians. He prayed, and God brought the victory. His is a story of self-sufficient failure, repentance, prayer, and God’s faithful response. His is a story like mine. Dependence was my big learning scheme for 2012, and I know it will continue into the rest of my life. Like a plant requires sustenance outside of itself to flourish, as much as I want to grow into Christ’s likeness and bear fruit for his Kingdom, I am entirely inept apart from the gracious cultivation of my heavenly Father. 

There is a multitude of arenas in which God is teaching me the delight of dependence. Most of the time, my lessons look a lot like ordinary, everyday life as I ask the Lord to help me pursue the people around me diligently, love them sincerely, respond to them graciously, teach my students wisely, coach my volleyball team effectively, lead the women’s study faithfully, and serve my local church discerningly. But I’m desperate for the Lord in more than just my interaction with others. My need is so much deeper. All of those actions mean nothing if they are not motivated and fueled by the work of Christ in his life, death, resurrection, and ascension. Joy comes in him. So I’m desperate for him to help me love and know him more completely, to feel the weight of the gospel more keenly, to understand truth more fully, to pray more faithfully. Some days I’m desperate for his help to simply press my roots into his Word. That’s the most important lesson of dependence: recognizing that when Jesus says we can do nothing apart from him, he really means nothing –not even the routine stuff of our everyday lives. And we can't just walk around with this vague idea of our need for God. We actually have to do the depending and ask him for help. 

Apart from the everyday, 2012 also brought some unique moments of Dependence 101 as God allowed me to see a bit of the world. International travel has a way of forcing dependence because everything is so unfamiliar that even accomplishing the most basic functions is literally a divine miracle. Here are a few highlights of God’s grace towards me around the globe:

• Bangkok, Thailand: Leia and I had 45 minutes to get from our international flight terminal, through the massive airport (including the Customs line), to our domestic flight terminal. We knew ahead of time it might be tricky, so we were praying before we left. God sent a Thai officer to put us through the Customs line for Thai citizens, so our wait went from 45 minutes to 10. The Lord also delayed our domestic flight to provide even more time. 
• London, England: I was getting on the train to catch my flight out but the train was very delayed. I returned to the stationmaster -half panicking, half praying- to get an alternative route. He directed me to the other side of the platform. By mistake, I had initially got on the platform for the westbound train, when I needed the eastbound train. Had God not brought a very timely delay to redirect my steps, I would’ve lost a lot of time and probably missed my flight... 
• Venice, Italy: Dani and I got stranded on the outskirts of the city so we had to find our way, in the dark, back to the city center. There are no street lights because there are no streets, and Venice isn’t really known for its safety. That's when I started praying. God soon provided a large, loud group of English-speaking visitors in the same predicament. One of them was a New Yorker who looked a lot like Kevin James from “The King of Queens.” I felt quite safe. 

I appreciate all the opportunities to visit new places and experience different cultures, but my travels only highlighted the fact that the greatest blessings, at home or abroad, come in experiencing God's faithfulness and spending time with his people. My time in Thailand was sweet because it was time spent with two dear sisters in the faith who help me press on in Jesus. My time in England was precious because it was time spent with brothers and sisters in Christ who took me in and allowed me to live life with them even though I was a complete stranger. They are now the dearest of friends. Only God can create fellowship like that. Only the gospel can unite people, in spite of their sinfulness and all the problems it causes, and make them a powerful testimony for Jesus. Another part of depending on God is depending on the gospel community into which he saves his children. That sometimes means wading into the mess of life and taking some hits. Frankly, I sometimes want to shy away from the hurt. But I know God designed his life-changing love to be displayed in the Christ-created harmony of his people. In Christ, he has guaranteed its ultimate success, and we can be sure he will redeem all the wounds we may incur in the process.

In the face of a new year, I can only pray God will continue to grow my dependence on him so that my joy will be even more complete. I pray that same dependence and joy for you. As we rely on the Lord, the delight comes when he shows his faithfulness and goodness again and again. As we take our baby steps of obedience, he meets us with great strides of grace. 

May the God who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” shine in your hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. (1 Cor 4:6) 

Joyfully sustained by his profound sufficiency, 
Cristi 




From 2012...  
Things to read: Gospel Wakefulness • Everyday Church • The Worst Hard Time • Cook’s Illustrated 
Things to eat & drink: French apple cake • homemade pasta • brioche aux amandes bostock • pad see ew • strong Yorkshire tea with cream and sugar • real gelato • Thai tea • baked eggs Florentine • Bobby Flay’s grilled shrimp scampi • Yorkshire puddings • Branston Pickle • legit Italian eggplant parmigiana 
Things to hear: Ligon Duncan’s “The Underestimated God” • Russell Moore’s “Acting the Miracle Together” • Kevin DeYoung’s “Bread and Wine” • other talks from T4G and DG 2012 Moments to remember: the timeline above plus… time with my niece and nephews • a summer coffee date with Leia • eternal conversations with my volleyball players • tying quilts with Grandma Jan • family movie nights and game days • a fall lunch with Kendal & an afternoon studying at the coffee shop 

For 2013... 
Things to read: The Best-Kept Secret of Christian Mission • Gospel Deeps • Calvin’s Institutes •Boenhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy • Manhunt: The 12-Day Chase for Lincoln’s Killer • Kingdom Through Covenant • The Anxious Dragon: China's New Middle Class • Where Am I Wearing 
Things to eat & drink: chocolate-espresso dacquoise • saag paneer • more Yorkshire tea with cream and sugar • master venison so it doesn’t taste like venison • tikka masala • your recommendations for good recipes 
Moments to make: more time with my niece and nephews plus the arrival of a new one • women’s community study of 1 John • watching students blossom • family history project • marriages of many beloved friends